Persons with Disabilities: Reconciliation Preparation, First Eucharist Preparation, Confirmation Preparation, Support and Counsel for families with children with disabilitiesThe Office of Marriage, Family, and Life (MFL) works to assist and encourage all Christians to fulfill their call to holiness. Through this purpose, MFL offers a variety of services to people whose needs vary depending on each individual. One offering of this Office is marriage preparation for those engaged couples seeking to unite through Holy Matrimony and with that, grow deeper in Catholic formation before committing to one another for a lifetime. The Catholic Services Appeal Foundation believes that prioritizing such services is vital to the sustainability of not only the community of the Archdiocese of St. Paul and Minneapolis but also the Church worldwide. We invite you to read the testimonial below from a young woman named Melanie who recently attended a marriage preparation retreat.
“My fiancé and I attended a marriage retreat this past April through the Archdiocese of Saint Paul and Minneapolis, hosted by the Office of Marriage, Family, and Life. The retreat began on Friday night and ended on Saturday night. It consisted of various presentations that were intended to help us prepare for marriage; specifically, the retreat presented topics that the Archdiocese feels would come up in our marriage. These topics varied from communication methods, sexuality in marriage, and Natural Family Planning, to a couple Q and A panel and financial planning. After each presentation, couples were given around twenty to thirty minutes to walk around outside and discuss the presentation.
My fiancé and I initially somewhat dreaded the retreat, thinking of hours spent in a lecture hall on our weekend off listening to presenters talk about how great marriage is. However, we were both pleasantly surprised by how helpful and meaningful this retreat was for our relationship—presently as an engaged couple and also for our future as husband and wife.
With that said, we found a few presentations the most helpful. During the talk about sexuality and marriage (a cringe-worthy topic to discuss in public with strangers), the presenting couple gave two pieces of advice to keep intimacy in our relationship throughout the rest of our lives. First, they told us to give our spouse a 5-second compliment every day; tell your spouse something you appreciate or admire about them every day and the receiving spouse accepts (without the “oh stop its” or “nooo I’m nots”). Even as an engaged couple, we have found this to be very effective since the retreat. It forces us to take a few seconds during our busy lives to stop, think about our spouse, to be thankful for them, and to tell them of our thankfulness. It also gives us the opportunity to hear everyday things that our spouse finds attractive about us; it seems simple but it allows intimacy in busy day-to-day lives. Additionally, the couple told us to turn one of our daily “pecks” (quick second kisses given before leaving for work or upon arrival home) into a “10 second kiss”. Stopping, looking at your spouse, and actually embracing for 10 seconds. They even made us stand up in the lecture hall and practice! Again, a simple 10 seconds out of a busy day to appreciate and love your spouse; it is another method to allow intimacy every single day. Second, we found the presentation on finances very helpful. It was very nice to sit down, listen to some basic financial advice, and spend the reflection period talking about what a budget would look like as a married couple; what is important to us financially, what our financial goals are, what we want to save for, etc.
All of the talks consisted of basic, fundamental topics every couple already knows is important for a successful marriage: good communication, maintaining intimacy, etc. However, the retreat allowed couples to be quiet together, to listen, and to reflect on the topics and how they present themselves in our personal relationships. Especially in a hectic time preparing for a wedding, this retreat allowed us to be still and prepare for our marriage after the wedding.”
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Totus Tuus Experiences
My name is Bailey and my home parish is Saint Patrick’s in Oak Grove, MN. This last summer, I was a member of one of the Totus Tuus teams for the Archdiocese of Saint Paul and Minneapolis. I decided to teach Totus Tuus because I wanted to be able to share my faith with the youth of the Archdiocese and grow personally in my own faith as well. One of my favorite things about Totus Tuus is seeing how excited the children are to learn about the faith. Surprisingly, the children can understand the concepts that we taught very well (Virtues and Sorrowful Mysteries of the Rosary). I like to say that the children are like little sponges. They absorb up everything with regards to the faith. The three goals of Totus Tuus are to pray more, learn more, and to have FUN! I truly believe all of the youth achieve those goals throughout the week of Totus Tuus. I would highly encourage all youth to participate in the Totus Tuus program. If you are a college age student, I would encourage you to pray about if God is calling you to give a summer to teach Totus Tuus.
One of my favorite moments from the summer that kept me going as a Totus Tuus teacher was teaching a class on the Eucharist. I was teaching a 5th/6th grade class of all boys. There were only 5 of them so the class was nice for a conversation lesson. During my lesson on the Eucharist, I started telling them stories of different Eucharist Miracles. The boys were listening very intently and their mouths practically dropped when they heard about the power of God through the Eucharist. All of the boys were Altar servers at Mass. One of the boys stated that it was so amazing to be able to serve Jesus Himself at Mass!
It is through stories like these that make me excited about my faith. I then realize that this is the reason why I believe God is calling me to become a youth minister so that I might share the love of Christ with other people that I meet.
About Totus Tuus
Totus Tuus (Latin for Totally Yours) is a parish based summer catechetical program inspired by Saint John Paul II for grade schoolers and high schoolers supported by the Archdiocesan Office of Marriage Family and Life. Teams of four (two college students and two seminarians) are sent to participating parishes in the Archdiocese, serving for a week in each parish Sunday-Thursday. In the summer of 2015 there were 3 teams and they went to 18 parishes.
Grade schoolers meet during the day, high schoolers in the evening. The grade school program has catechetical instruction, songs, games, daily Mass, opportunity for Confess, lunch, and recess. The week ends with a gigantic water fight or a human ice cream Sunday (one of the volunteers!) The high school program includes a night of Adoration, opportunity for Confession, catechetical instruction, and a night of fellowship.
The Five Marks of Totus Tuus:
- Proclamation of the Gospel
- Explanation: Examination of the reasons for our beliefs
- Christian Witness: An experience of Christian living
- Celebration of the Sacraments: Especially Holy Eucharist and Confession
- Active Witness: Participating in the Missionary Spirit of the Church
The Five Pillars of Totus Tuus:
- The Eucharist
- Marian Devotion
- Catechetical Instruction
- Vocational Discernment
- Fun
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A Testimony of Love: Totus Tuus
My name is Rachel and I served on one of the Totus Tuus teams this last summer. It changed my life. Before we were able to teach, Totus Tuus teachers from 5 Dioceses around the Midwest came together to have a week of training at the Immaculate Heart of Mary Seminary in Winona, MN. During this week, we absorbed theology and catechism lessons based on the 2015 Totus Tuus curriculum at a collegiate level, knowing full well that we’d eventually be breaking it down to teach to 1st-12th graders. Although initially overwhelming, we had plenty of help from our directors, priests, and experienced teachers that were serving a second year in the program. With the guidance of the Holy Spirit, our directors determined our teams half-way through the week—I was placed on Team Mary with three others: Grace and Archdiocesan seminarians Tyler and Joseph. Then came our first Team Mary meeting; we were going to be spending a lot of time together in the next 6 weeks, so we discussed our personalities, languages, strengths, and weaknesses to know how to properly affirm and support each other throughout our ministry as brothers and sisters in Christ. We had a good mix: Tyler had served on Totus Tuus two summers before with the Diocese of Winona, Grace and I were pursuing education degrees, and Joseph brought an undying energy to the team that sustained our ministry—we were set.
We began to grasp onto and embody the 5 pillars of Totus Tuus: Eucharistic Devotion, Marian Devotion, Catechetical Instruction, Vocational Discernment, and Fun. At the very center of the Totus Tuus day program (1st-6th grade) was the celebration of the Mass—Eucharistic Devotion—and for the night program (7th-12th grade), Adoration of the Blessed Sacrament was held on Tuesday evenings. It was only fitting to have these celebrations to remind both ourselves and the students and youth the reason for all we do (including fun): to glorify the Lord and share His love and joy with the world. The second pillar—Marian Devotion—was exercised through the title of the program, Totus Tuus.
“Totus Tuus Suum Maria” was the papal motto of Saint John Paul II, meaning that we totally belong to the Blessed Virgin Mother—everything we have we give confidently to Mary, who leads us directly to her Son. As a team, we prayed the Most Holy Rosary daily with her intercession as well as taught the Sorrowful Mysteries of the Rosary during our day program. Pillar two transitioned nicely into the third pillar: Catechetical Instruction. In addition to teaching about the Sorrowful Mysteries, this year’s curriculum included the Moral and Theological Virtues as well as the Beatitudes. For me, during the first few weeks, I was focused on teaching the content, but as the summer went on, the new knowledge about my faith became part of who I was, making it easier to teach and show the students what it means to live as a Catholic.
With prayer each day and constant reliance on the Lord, we embraced the fourth pillar: Vocational Discernment. Now, this meant discernment of vocation for not only ourselves, but for our students and youth as well. Class periods were dedicated to discussing God’s call, the “Vocations Cake” (the different levels of vocation), and what that means for each of us—a universal call to holiness. Each day, a saint came to visit during our day program, showing the students that they, too, are called to be saints, and it IS possible. The saints spoke about listening to the Lord’s call, and we practiced listening to Him in class, at Mass, and during Adoration for the night program. Finally, with every ounce of energy we could muster, we accomplished the fifth and final pillar: FUN! Each day, we were able to share the joy of the Lord through prayers, silly songs, music, laughs, games at recess, ice breakers, activities in class, and most of all, during the youth night for the night program on Thursday evenings and the (cold) water fight that was held each Friday afternoon for the day program. These opportunities allowed us to be in fellowship with the students and youth of each parish, getting to know them outside the classroom environment—who they truly are as children and youth.
After leaving Columbia Heights, we traveled next to Transfiguration Parish in Oakdale, MN, where we had the most students and youth we had all summer. We learned the importance of organization and the energy that is possible when so many are gathered in the name of Jesus. Our next stop was the Church of Saint Timothy in Maple Lake, MN. Here, with a smaller number of students, we were able to build relationships with not only the students and youth, but also with the families in the community as well as the parish priest and others who worked at the parish. This became a trend that continued on our Totus Tuus mission.
We began our second three week session at sister parishes SS. Peter and Paul in Loretto, MN and St. Thomas in Corcoran, MN. These two small but vibrant parishes reminded us of the reverence for the Eucharist and the importance of the unity of the parish family. Saint Patrick Parish in Oak Grove, MN was our second-to-last stop, and the support we received from staff, parents, and volunteers was overwhelming. We learned the value of flexibility while staying grounded in prayer. And, finally, we jumped across the border to St. Joseph Parish in Amery, WI to help out a parish in the Diocese of Superior.
I learned how to love, willing the good of the other; love the students and youth I served, those I encountered, and especially my three teammates. I became this summer, and desire every day, a witness to this love I learned to both give and receive.
I was humbled by all that we received after each week— we were first-hand witnesses to God’s grace, poured out into the hearts of those around us. Working as a teacher on Totus Tuus this summer provided me with a testimony of love, and since God is love, it is ultimately a testimony of God.
+Totus Tuus Suum Maria+
Mary, we are totally yours.